Wednesday, December 30, 2009

Marriage Counseling - The Importance of Communication

What kind of communication do you and your spouse practice? How would you rate it on a scale of one to ten?

Do you feel completely understood by your spouse? Does your spouse feel completely understood by you?

When we feel understood, we feel loved? Does your spouse feel loved by you?

In our Marriage Counseling practice, over 95% of the couples who come to us practice poor communication skills. As a result, neither spouse feels understood and loved.
What are some of the “poor” communication practices?

Here are a few:
1. Interrupting
2. Stealing the topic away and making it about you
3. Improper nonverbal communication (93% of all communication is nonverbal)
4. Mindreading
5. Not listening
6. Speaking in attacking manner (not remaining neutral)
7. Speaking too long without giving your spouse a chance to respond

There are many others, but these are very common. If you want to make your spouse feel loved, Marriage Counseling thinks that it is important to replace these negative practices with positive practices.

A few of these are:
1. Using neutral statements and questions
2. Being concise when you speak
3. Check it out if you don’t understand
4. Be a great Listener
5. Show interest in what your spouse is saying
6. Never interrupt

Couples who have practiced poor listening often find it hard to turn it around to become good listeners. If you really want to make your spouse feel loved, Marriage Counseling encourages you to learn how to be a good listener.

In our Marriage Counseling practice, we work with couples and teach them to become really good listeners. They not only learn how to be good listeners, they also practice those skills while they are here.

Whatever condition your Marriage or family is in, you can make it better by learning to become good listeners.

If your marriage only needs some tweaking, you may be able to learn from good books on the subject. If your marriage in crisis, we would suggest you get help from a skilled Marriage Counselor.

Wednesday, December 23, 2009

Christian Marriage Counseling

You wake up with the same thoughts you had before you went to bed. Something is wrong, really wrong. There is so much tension in your marriage relationship that you could cut it with a knife. Last night’s argument was never settled. None of you arguments seem to get settled.

Where has the joy gone? This isn’t how it began. You remember when you really got along, but now it is just a dim memory. Maybe you never did get along. It is sad, so sad.

You wonder, “Is it really worth it to stay together”. You think, “Maybe I should just leave”. It may seem that you can’t stand another day of this “in house” estrangement. There is no real relationship other than conflict. But divorce or separation is very scary and maybe not what you really want. What then?

Couples experience these thoughts all the time. Both husbands and wives all over the country are living lives totally devoid of joy. But, there is hope. Things do not need to stay the same. What they need is a new direction and a new perspective on how the relationship and family can be restored.

Marriage Rescue Associates answer is simple – Marriage Counseling. As a trained Christian Marriage Counselor, experienced in dealing with these issues can help you rediscover what drew the two of you together. The Marriage Counselor (also known as a Couples Counselor) can help you construct solutions to rekindle love and rebuild trust that has been torn down by endless conflict, indifference, and unmet needs.

Marriage Counseling should focus in on the root problems in your relationships. The focus should not end there. The real area of focus should be on change.

Christian couples are not immune to these challenges. The divorce rate among Christians is similar to the rate among non-Christian couples. Christians should normally seek out Christian Marriage Counseling.

In our research over the last 23 years, we have discovered that the most effective method for helping couples reach their goals is to utilize Intensive Marriage Counseling. This method brings the couple together with their Christian Marriage Counselor for at least three days (all day) so that they can get to the root of the problem and develop a plan of action to end the impasse.
Don’t let your marriage or family become another statistic when you can actually do something to change it.

Seek out Marriage Counseling from an experienced Marriage Counselor that understands your situation and makes you feel comfortable with them.

Visit us online at www.marriagerescue.org